Alone and Guarded
by Shaz1993
Summary: Clary has been in the Orphaninch since birth, she's the only one there her whole life. She is known for making trouble and picking fights so everyone tends to avoid her, but what happens when a sweet, friendly and vounerable Simon is thrown in?
1. im not ready

**I'm Not Ready**

Eighteen year old, Jocelyn Fray paced the bathroom while Maryse her best friend since kindergarden, sat on the edge of the bathtub.  
"How much longer?" Jocelyn asked running her hands through her messy hair.  
"One minute" Maryse sighed. "Joce, are you ok?"  
"No, I am not, I'm eighteen and I'm most likely pregnant! I haven't even finished High School. What about college?" Jocelyn started to sob.

Maryse ingulfed her friend in a hug as they awaited for the test.  
"I can't look"  
"Joce, you're-"  
"Don't say it"  
"Pregnant!"  
Jocelyn fell the the ground sobbing, whispering only one word. "no" over and over.  
"Honey, you have to tell him" Maryse sighed.  
"I know, I just need a few days..."

It was a week later when Maryse cornered her friend at lunch.  
"Have you told him yet?" She asked. Jocelyn looked at her through her eyelashes.  
"I'll take that as a no then"  
"I haven't had the chance, i'm meeting him tonight at his so i'll tell him then. I just know he's going to walk Mar, and I can't do this on my own. I'm not cut out for it" Jocelyn sighed.  
"You have me" Maryse smiled and placed a hand on her friends arm.  
"I know"

"Val, can we talk?" Jocelyn asked as she sat on the sofa beside her boyfriend.  
"Sure thing baby, what's got that pretty little brain of yours all worked up?" he asked pushing a loose strand of hair behind her ear.  
"I've something to tell you" She went on. "Just promise me you won't walk away from me?" a stray tear fell from her eyes.  
"Babe, what's wrong?" Valentine asked, he was getting a little worried now.  
"Im...Im...Pregnant" she whispered.  
"What was that babe?" he asked.  
"I'm pregnant" She looked at him, tears now flooding down her face.  
"Awe baby, come here. We'll take care of this don't you worry. we'll get rid of it" Valintine shushed her.  
"What do you mean get rid of it Val?" Jocelyn asked.  
"Ya know, get rid of it" He shrugged.  
"NO, I AM NOT HAVING A TERMINATION!" Jocelyn yelled.  
"Jo, we're eighteen, we can't raise a baby, I've to take over the family company and I can't do that if I've to mind a baby. You will be getting rid of it" he told her as if she didn't have a chioce in the matter.  
"No Val, no way in hell. I don't want this child any more than you do, but I refuse to terminate it and if you can't repect that then we are through" she crossed her arms.  
"Then I guess you should leave"

"Mar, it was horrible, he walked away he wanted… to… to kill…" Jocelyn sobbed in her friends arms.  
"Hush now, it's okay, you can move in with me and we can hire a tutor so you don't fall back in school. We can tell people you're sick and you can come back next year to a brand new start and we can find a nice family you take the kid." Maryse told her.  
"Yeh, you think that will work?" Jocelyn looked at her best friend with hope in her eyes.  
"Yes it will"

**A/N: hope you liked it. R&R **  
**Love Shaz**  
**xoxoxoxox**


	2. giving up

**The Choice**

"Just breath Jo, just deep breaths" Maresse tried her best to sooth her friend.  
"Uhhhh, It hurts" Jocelyn cried.  
"I know honey, I know" Maresse hushed her.  
"Get me the epidural" Jocelyn screamed.  
Nine hours and twenty minutes later Jocelyn lay on her side and the nurse came in with the baby.  
"Congradulations it's a girl" She smiled. "Do you want to hold her?"  
"No, just take her away"

It went on like that for the days that Jocelyn was in the hospital. She didn't want to see the baby, hold the baby or even know the baby was there.  
"Jocelyn Fairchild, you're can go home now, all you need to do is just sign these discharge papers." Jocelyn was all so happy to be out.  
"What are you going to do about the baby?" Maresse asked.  
"Orphaninch" was all Jo said while she packed her bag.  
That nite, Jocelyn wrote a little note and placed it on top of the basket as she placed it down on the ground in front of the door. she rang the bell and ran. She hid around the corner as a lady opened the door, just then the baby started to cry.  
"Oh my, who left you here?" the lady lifted the child up and saw the note.  
"Her name is Clarissa, ok Clarissa, lets get you inside"

Martha paced her office not knowing what to do. She was so mad at the way she was carrying on, and she had no idea on how to handle her.  
"I just can't believe you Clarissa, you used to be such a sweet kid. Your behaviour is just unacceptable" Martha huffed at the sixteen year old with wild firey hair, with an attitude to match.  
"Oh what ever Martha" Clarissa sighed.  
"What happened?" Martha asked.  
"You want to know what happened? all the other kids here lost their parents, my mom just didnt want me! she left me here with nothing but a note tellin me my name, she didnt die she was just a teenage slut who get herself knocked up and couldnt handle a baby" Clarissa yelled.  
"Dont take that tone with me young lady" Martha worned.  
"What you going to put me on more kitchen duty?" the teenager sneared.  
"Go to your room" Martha snapped.  
"Gladly" and with that Clarissa stormed out and up to her room where she ran into other teens and just glared at them.

**A/N: hope ya'll liked this chapter :)**  
**R&R**  
**Love Shaz xoxo**


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